A granddaddy long legs climbed onto my face while I was out brush hogging on the tractor.

I’d like to apologize to the neighbor for his fence, chicken house, doghouse, clothesline, and for leaving the scene of an accident.

I’d also like to apologize to my wife for laughing at her fear of spiders.

Generally, I have no fear of members of the arachnid family (certain politicians excluded), but that hot morning sitting atop 37 horses of diesel engine, I did.

I’m not afraid ...

Ever have one of those moments where something in your head says you need to do something, but you’re not sure why? Recently, a memory I have of my grandfather cooking on a charcoal grill sparked that little voice to give me a direct order.

The instructions were to find that same make and model of charcoal grill my grandfather used to have and buy one. I had no idea what I was looking for, I just remembered that the grill ...

The door of a 1971 Buick Electra 225 Limited is longer than its name, and likely heavier than the entire car you’re driving now.

That last statement is a bit of an exaggeration, but not by much.

A friend of mine recently bought a new Ford. The body is made of aluminum. The soda cans I buy are made of aluminum, but the cars I have are still made of at least some steel.

When I first started driving in Ashdown, Arkansas, all ...

I’m always pleasantly surprised by the amount of messages I receive and from where they come.

Often, they’re related to a previous column and the person writing shares a memory or story that was stirred by what they read.

It’s one of the main reasons I write. To stir memories. Especially the good ones.

Recently, I was contacted by two readers who not only lived near each other, they also lived near me. That’s unusual. It’s not uncommon to receive an email from ...

As a kid growing up in Ashdown, Arkansas, there were places I was supposed to be found and a couple of places I wasn’t.

One of the places I was never supposed to be found was in the pool hall.

I still have no idea what the name of the town’s pool hall was (maybe it didn’t have one on purpose), but one thing it did have was interesting people.

Guys. Interesting guys, to be exact. I never saw a woman in the ...

I remember my parents’ first remote control.

It was me.

You hear a lot about child labor laws and how working kids is against the rules. It’s cruel. It’s unusual. It’s punishment.

When I was a kid, we worked like pack mules, and we acted like we liked it. To act any other way would’ve been met with such caring phrases as: “Because I said so.” “I don’t care what Billy does, I’m not his parent.” And, “Stop crying or I’ll give you ...

The earliest movie I remember seeing at the drive-in was Fantastic Voyage. If you haven’t seen that one, it’s essentially Honey I Shrunk The Kids. Only they weren’t kids and it wasn’t a comedy.

A group of American scientists and a submarine were shrunk to microscopic size and injected through a syringe into a Russian scientist to save his life.

Pretty heady stuff for a kid in footed pajamas sitting in the backseat of a ’60 model Buick.

That ...

We need more Archie Bunkers and Fred Sanfords today.

One morning as I was watching TV, I tried to think of one television character we have today that has anywhere close to the same level of notoriety of any of the ones with which we grew up.

I couldn’t think of one.

Today, there’s no Archie, Fred, Andy, Barney, Fonzie, or anyone else even close.

I set my DVR to record All In The Family, Highway Patrol, Dragnet, and many other classics. But very ...

Auto tune. Ever heard of it? Neither had any of the singers and songwriters we grew up with.

Today, technology has taken the place of many things. Including real talent. Auto tune is a device that can take someone who sings off key and tune them to where it sounds as if they can sing on key.

That’s cheating.

It’s like rigging the game and then giving everyone a trophy.

This came to mind when I was listening to the radio (not Spotify or ...

Cell phones have certainly changed our lives, but I’m not altogether convinced it’s for the better.

If my life were a TV series, this would have been a recent episode:

We now join John in the men’s room at Braum’s:

Siri: “In 800 feet, turn right at the intersection.”

(John realizes his map app is still on, but can’t get to it at the moment.)

Voice from stall: “Lady, you’re in the wrong bathroom.”

John: “Sir, that lady you’re hearing is on my phone.”

Voice from stall: ...