Chickens Don’t Have Fingers

Who’s in charge of choosing and naming the food?

Recently during a night out at dinner, I noticed food names on the menu, which I normally think nothing of, but the more I thought about them, the weirder they sounded.

This, in turn, made me think of foods which shouldn’t even be food.

Some food names may be effective in selling the product, but they can also be downright creepy. And some things just shouldn’t be eaten.

Chicken fingers. Somehow, this menu item, normally ...

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We Had A Lot Of Class

“J-O-H-N-N-Y,” I said.

Mrs. Walker looked across the desk at me and smiled. She thanked me for telling her how to spell my name. I liked Mrs. Walker from the start. She was nice to me.

It was 1968. Johnson was about to leave the White House and Nixon was soon to be elected. It was a tumultuous year for the country, and it was my first year of school.

This particular day was registration day. I said I liked Mrs. Walker, and ...

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Listen To Your Heart

“Mister Moore, I have bad news. You’ve had a heart attack.”

This was not going to be a typical Wednesday.

I stared at the ER physician from my ambulance gurney and tried to process what my wife, boss and I had just heard.

“How bad was it?” I asked.

“Significant,” he responded.

At the ripe old age of 52, I was the newest member of the coronary club.

For almost two days, I’d had the classic symptoms; significant chest pressure, pain radiating down my left arm ...

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Ice Cream You Scream

Ice cream is the perfect dessert.

After years of trying lots of different sweets, and teetering on the brink of numerous diabetic comas, I have come to the conclusion that ice cream is, in fact, the perfect dessert.

I have long argued that pie is better than cake, and I stand by that argument. However, choosing an overall best in the sweets category is easy. It’s ice cream.

Ice cream is far above other desserts in its diversity, taste, texture, and its consistency ...

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