Watch This

Watches are going the way of the buggy whip.

Many people, especially younger folks, are opting out of wearing a wristwatch. It seems that the same thing that made the Kodak camera, the video camera, the calculator, and many other once commonplace items, has also made the watch obsolete. The smartphone.

As if people needed another reason to stare at their cellphone, the iPhone is also now a timepiece for many.

Long before batteries powered watches, you had to wind your watch each ...

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The Marriage Manual

There should be a marriage manual.

When a man asks a woman to marry him, the woman gets a wedding shower. The man gets a bachelor party.

Women are practical. They give the bride-to-be kitchen towels, a Crockpot, frying pan, bedding, dishes, cookware, an iron, and silverware.

The groom’s buddies give him a hangover.

What they should give the guy is an instruction booklet.

The marriage instruction booklet should be written by really old men who have been married at least 50 years.

If you are ...

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Do You Speak Southern?

Southerners have our own language.

I’m not referring to our accent, although a Southern accent will get you free beer in a Yankee bar because they like hearing us talk.

No, I’m referring to how we describe things and get our points across.

Down South, we all get a Coke. But we don’t all get the same brand. A Coke is what you call a soda pop. If someone says they want a Coke, you ask them what kind. They may want a ...

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A Picky Picker

I was an American Picker before it had a name.

I grew up in a family full of pickers. We just didn’t call it that. We called it garage sailing.

The TV show American Pickers features a couple of guys from Iowa who travel the country buying old items for resale.

In the 60s and 70s, my family bought old items, but many times we bought them to use.

My dad’s father was a blacksmith, as was his dad before him. Part of running ...

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The Chemistry Chicken

We had done the math, and without a doubt, Todd and I were going to flunk 11th grade chemistry.

It was 1978 and as my buddy and I sat in the back of Mr. Smith’s room, we knew that we would run out of school year before we had any chance of making a passing grade.

We were desperate.

As class was dismissed, we waited until all of the other students left the room.

“Mr. Smith?” I said. “Can we talk to you for ...

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