Cousins – Times Two

I opened my Facebook app on my phone and saw that I had three private messages.

Two were the typical, “Please forward this before a worldwide virus overtakes everyone on Facebook,” kind of thing. But one was a message from someone I don’t hear from often – my cousin, Randy.

Randy is the middle child of my mom’s oldest sister. He and his older brother, Doug, and I would hang out during holidays when we were growing up, but I also used ...

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Mel Blanc

I waited six months to talk to him. That’s what his receptionist told me the wait time was for an interview when I called his Beverly Hills office in early 1984.

Since he was my childhood idol, I was willing to wait the required one-half year to have him on my radio show. And wait, I did.

“Alright,” I said. “Six months from today is August 8th. What time should I call?”

“Noon,” she answered.

“Noon it is,” I responded. And then I ...

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I’ll Take The Fall

One of my most vivid memories of fall happened during junior high. I was standing in the end zone prior to the start of a game. I could barely feel my fingers and toes.

It was October, but it was unusually cold (Al Gore had yet to invent global warming). My shoulder pads, helmet, and other gear typically made me sweat profusely in the Arkansas heat and humidity. But a cold front, and the rain that pushed it through, had arrived.

I ...

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By George

 

He played James Bond in one film. And then he walked away.

Those in the film industry thought he was nuts. Others said arrogant. Who was he?

Lazenby. George Lazenby.

Unlike Sean Connery, Roger Moore, Pierce Brosnan, and Daniel Craig, Lazenby was not well known when he got the role of 007 in 1968. Since then, he’s known mainly as the answer to the trivia question: Which actor played Bond only once in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service?

It is ironic that the Bond ...

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Under Cover

It was so tattered, I honestly didn’t think that it could be saved.

It was my grandmother’s quilt, and the years of use had taken its toll. My mother brought it to my wife and asked her if she could repair it. My bride is a seamstress, and a fine one at that, but I could tell by the look on her face that she wasn’t so sure it could be saved. But, she didn’t hesitate to say that she’d try.

My ...

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Thanks, Burt

 

Burt Reynolds made 94 movies. One of those is not one of his best-known films, but it was the first Reynolds movie that got my attention and made me want to know who he was.

W.W. and the Dixie Dancekings was no Citizen Kane, but neither was Smokey and the Bandit. But, boy, were they really fun movies.

And they were fun because of Burt Reynolds.

Dancekings was a story about a country music group trying to make it, and a man (Reynolds) ...

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Here Comes The Pride

 

In the summer of 1975, I was still riding bikes to get around. My 10-speed was my main mode of transportation.

I had saved my earnings from the entire previous summer to buy that bike. It was $100. Adjusted for inflation, that’s $442.89 now.

Today, some people have a different approach when they need money. They ask other people to give them some of theirs. A Go Fund Me account is something people set up when they want cash. How it works ...

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What Are You Eating?

Years ago during lunch, a friend who had moved to Texas from another part of the country, which will remain nameless (Maryland), began talking about something called “Scrapple.”

I had just sawed through and devoured another bite of my chicken fried steak with gravy when I told him that Scrapple was one of my favorite games.

“No, not Scrabble,” he said. “It’s Scrapple. Scrapple is a food,” he added.

I took a bite of my mashed potatoes and gravy and raised an eyebrow.

“If ...

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One Day My Prints Will Come

The first time I saw a Polaroid camera in the 1960s, it was one of the most impressive things I’d seen. Of course, when you’re a little kid, you’re seeing many things for the first time, so lots of things are impressive.

But the Polaroid camera was different. The photo was self-developing.

Instead of mailing a roll of film and waiting weeks for the pictures to be developed, turned into prints, and mailed back to you, Polaroid pictures were ready almost instantly. ...

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All y’all

 

Y’all ever heard of a colloquialism?

According to the folks at Merrimack-Webster, a colloquialism is “…a local or regional dialect expression.”

Another definition is using language that could be considered, “unacceptably informal.” 

I have been accused of both. Being unacceptable and informal – sometimes separately, but most often in combination.

Yankees often make fun of Southerners for the way we talk, by trying to imitate us. Truth is, there isn’t much else that’s funnier than someone with a thick Northern accent muddling through ...

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